Well the wedding nonsense is over now. What a beautiful day it was, and of course the only things missing were these two. I had their pictures out as a memorial on our gift table. At one point in the night, I stood in front of those pictures and talked with them. Today is really emotional for me, I am missing them so much. Their anniversary will be this Sunday. I think I've been doing much better, I'm letting go a bit more. Sometimes I have days like today where my heart feels so heavy that I can barely breathe.

August 4th would have been my Granny's 83rd birthday. I still haven't talked to my aunt. She's called a few times, but I just can't talk to her. I can't understand her incoherent alcohol infused words. I'm so angry with her I just can't deal with her still. I suppose in reality I have all that I need from my grandma's house. I have a few pictures and the doll Papoo and I got her for christmas the last year he was alive. I wish they were still here. I know that sounds repetitive, but it's not any less true than it was a year ago. I close my eyes sometimes and I can hear her voice.

My beloved Papoo would be 82 today. While things are moving along and I am feeling more at peace lately, I can't help but wonder how things would be today if he was still with us. If he and grandma were here, she and I would be baking a cake today for him. We would go out to eat, and sing him happy birthday. We would shower him with all kinds of gifts and gadgets that he didn't need. I would have given him a few new shirts that he would likely never wear.

i had a dream this morning, that i'm not completely sure was a dream.

i didn't realize it until earlier that today has been exactly 5 months since my granny passed away. i thought about her alot today. it's getting a tiny bit easier to do so. i miss her so much, and wish she was here to help me with things. i miss you granny. "i mean to tell ye"

I originally posted this in my Myspace blog, but I feel that it really belongs here.

Why can't I stop thinking about wonderful
summers of my childhood where I wandered among the weeds and insects of
East Texas? I am 25 years old now. Ten years ago at this time, I was
walking the lonely roads of a small country town flirting with boys
shamelessly.  Running barefoot in the front yard
with my grandmother, playing baseball with her while my grandfather
watched us from the porch, or throwing a tennis ball on the roof and

I had a dream a few nights ago that I thought was pretty cool.

Melba Louise Malone

Funeral services for Melba Louise Malone, 83, of Lubbock will be 11 a.m. Saturday, August 30, 2008 at Franklin-Bartley Funeral Home Chapel with Dr. Ken Horn officiating. Burial will follow in the City of Lubbock Cemetery. The family will receive friends at Franklin-Bartley Funeral Home from 6 to 8 p.m. Friday, August 29, 2008.

Grady Malone

Services for Grady Neal Malone, 74, of Lubbock will be at 2 p.m. Wednesday at Franklin Bartley Chapel with the Rev. Steve Shaw officiating.

Burial will be in City of Lubbock Cemetery under the direction of Franklin Bartley Funeral Home.

He died, Sunday, May 12, 2002, at his residence.

He was born, July 30, 1927, in Biardstown. He served in the U.S. Army in Germany during World War II as weather observer. He graduated from photography school and attended a business school in Cooper.